Am I Being a Hypochondriac?

The past two weeks I have felt there is something not right with my body. I have told my normal doctor and the doctor I saw today (the one doing the c-section) they seem to think that I am fine and just worrying over nothing I however don't think I am fine. At least on Friday I will be having baby and I won't have to worry to much about pre-eclampsia anymore.

Here are the signs of pre-eclampsia
1. High Blood Pressure (134/87 today)
2. Increase in protein of urine (said it looked fine but in reading about it, Dr. Google says that to get accurate protein you need a 24 hr. urine sample)
3. Changes in vision (I have massive floaters, it appears like gnats are flying around a light-very weird)
4. Severe headaches (check, they make me want to cry!)
5. Unusual bruising (I have bruised dots on my arms-have no clue what they are from)

I found that normal blood pressure for a pregnant woman is 120/80-I normally run 120/60 on most of my visits. Hypertension is usually 140/90 so I am right on that brink of hitting that point so I am really worried about it. Well in 2 days 17 hours I will have a baby boy in my arms and I pray that he is a healthy little guy.

Shattering News...

Yesterday my parents recieved a phone call from a law firm saying they needed to confirm CYB's death. My mom thought it was a bill collector trying to scam them on giving information about her. We had not talked to CYB in about six months after the wildfires destroyed their home and were evacuated. We knew they were safe due to a couple of news stories, this was the last we heard from her and my three nephews. (My brother is married to CYB but they have been seperated for five years and he has not even seen his boys-yes he is a deadbeat and its quite alright to say that... anyways) So, I begin to search on the internet for obituararies, I am unable to find any at all. I begin to think this is a scam then I got smart and checked the Social Security Death Index website and there it was in black and white. CYB death Sept. 8, 2008. I was in shock, she was only 37 years old, she wasn't in the best health but we sure didn't expect that and we sure thought that we would at least get a phone call from her lover who we welcomed into the family for the past five years and thought was a great guy as he stepped up to father my nephews... I couldn't believe my eyes, in a state of shock, confusion, disbelief, and then total panic. Where were my nephews? Nobody had contacted D my brother or my parents about it. The lawyer was a bill collector that had recieved notice of her death and was trying to confirm it, why if the lawyer was able to find us was the state of California unable to find any of to notify us... Again, where the hell were my nephews aged 9,7, & 6. I started searching the internet for my nephews names and stumbled across a court website. It showed that BH was granted custody (her lover and the man who raised them-their REAL daddy as far as I am concerned) on 11/22 since they were unable to find any other family. Obviously California did not try very hard in looking for them, which angers me because how many other children are awarded custody to people that might not be suitable to raise them because they really didn't search for any family. Anyways, I get a hold of one of CYB's friends that lives here in small town Kansas and see if she has a different phone number. She was also unaware that CYB had passed away as well. I try the phone number she has and BH did answer so I begun to "nicely" interrogate him. They believe that it was her heart because in July she had an angiogram that showed her heart was only functioning at 60%, my question is if the doctors knew this two months before she passed why wasn't something done? The day she passed away she had gotten a phone call from the school saying D.A. was sick and needed to be picked up so she sent D.W. to pick him up. When D.A & D.W returned they found their mom slunched over in bed, already blue. An ambulance was immediately called and they were unable to revive her. A death certificate still has not been issued (is this weird? I find that really odd) because her case is "complex" according to the county they live in because she was on a mixture of medications (a combination of 15).

I am not sure how I feel about BH raising my nephews. I know he is a really good guy and has always been in the boys' life and should be considered their daddy, but now he can legally get their last name changed. They are the last of the boys to carry my maiden name and that makes me sad knowing that our bloodline will end with these boys as I have no doubt BH will most likely legally adopt them, right now he has been granted permanent custody (I think these are two different things... right?). I am sure we will find out more in the months ahead I will by deadbeat brother would pull his head out of his ass and step up to the plate but I really don't see that happening due to him lying to the "girl of his dreams" who seems to think he only has one child and was unmarried. In actuallity he has five children and was married to CYB until she passed away.

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In other news I am still having a lot of contractions, I am sure at my next doctor appointment (Thur.) that I will be dilated farther. At least I have hit 35 weeks, according to BabyCenter he is 18 inches and 5.5 lbs, I wish my OB would do another sonogram since I have pre-term labor hanging over my head I would like to know about his lungs and organs so I know what to expect like we did with MS. I told her I wanted the steroid shot to make sure his lungs were matured but she didn't feel the need for this. That really upsets me because I feel that is what helped MS do so well when she was born at 36 weeks and only had temperature problems. Ugh, I am ready to pull my hair out and the doctor isn't helping.

34W6D and Dilated--WARNING this is a complaint post

If you have read any of my blog archives you will know my pregnancy with MS was not the best yet totally worth it. Now this pregnancy is beginning to resemble MS's and its been a struggle the past week or so because it is hard being on bed rest with a twenty month old who let me add is a bundle of energy. M is driving me nuts as its like pulling teeth to get him to pick up the house even though he is taking great care of MS. I never realized how much I actually did around the house everyday until I have gotten the privilege of cleaning everyday taken away. Yes I am complaining because I have to look at my house in total chaos. At least the house got vacuumed and the laundry is done but as for the dishes and the scrubbing of bathrooms well lets just say its not getting done! I saw the doctor on Monday and she checked me. I am effaced and two centimeters dilated at 34 weeks. This truly scares the crap out of me as 34 weeks is still pretty early and he needs time for his precious lungs to get stronger. I know survival rate is decent but I don't want decent I want excellent. I also remember when MS was in the NICU and the nurses would refer to the little boys that were Caucasian as puny little white boys because they always seems to do this worst. So having my sweet precious little boy in the catergory scarys the living daylights out of me. I am taking it day by day but the contractions and not being able to do anything is driving me mad but it will be worth it when he comes, hopefully later than sooner. They went ahead and scheduled the c-section for January 2nd, just in case he decides to stick around in the ol' uterus instead of being so impatient to get out. I hate to tell him its cold out here, not a tropical 98.6 degrees. Oh well, you can't tell kids nothing-they never listen as I am learning with my daughter!

Too Many Decisions in Life!

I think my brain is on total overload after all of the decisions that need to be made rather quickly. First on my agenda-school. I actually enrolled in Vatterott College today, I am not actually sure that I made the right decision and I probably should have done some research on it. Its to be a medical assistant and it will take 60 weeks and a whopping 23,000.00 I know YIKES! Later when I got home I was talking with a friend and she said she has a medical assistant certification as well and the career college she went through is not seen to highly upon by employers, which then got me thinking... I did some research and I realize some people are just grumpy and complain but the number of complaints about this school is crazy! I went to the BBB and the school has numerous complaints along with a class action lawsuit because their instructors teaching weren't even certified. I have 36 hours to decide I don't want to do it so I have to figure out my options. Go to a community college and get my LPN (2 years, $12,000.00 later) or go to the university for my full RN for 18,000.00. I also have to keep in mind baby #2 will be arriving in Dec. (gender still unknown). So do I go full force ahead and do 4 years in an university or 2 years and make about 20k less a year and be happy with that after all I will have two kids at that point who will need to be supported as well.

Secondly: State insurance is horrible and so is my caseworker. I have been trying to get on state insurance since JUNE it is now the middle of AUGUST. My worker kept telling me she didn't know what the hold up was so I took matters into my own hands and called up state insurance and they said "we haven't recieved your application" ARE YOU SERIOUS! This just tells me that my caseworker does nothing and state insurance is now expediting my case and sending out cards immediatly. Thank you state for giving me a crappy case worker who I promply called her supervisor to complain and have not gotten a call back, could this be a case of crappy state supervisor as well or there is just too many complaints about the workers she is employed to supervise??

Thirdly: M and I still can't decide on a name if it is a girl. I reallllllly want a name that he doesn't care for so he goes the battle. Maybe it will be a boy and we won't go through the battle as we have had a boy name picked up since MS was on the way.

Fourthly: Right now we are staying with my parents until we can get into something better. Its cramped but we are doing well considering. BUT any of the nice places we have found do not accept any pets. Our cats are 9 & 7 years old, spayed & declawed and they are our babies and I don't want to toss them to my parents for a place. I know some people may not be able to understand that but they were our kids before we even started having kids. Our cats are not pets-they are family and it is aggrevating being declined due to pets. Isn't there a pet friendly place for rent that is a 3 bdrm somewhere in this small town? grrr hiss, I guess those houses just weren't meant to be then.

Lastly: Everything is doing well with the pregnancy, nothing major to report. I lost 20 lbs in the beginning and I am slowly gaining that back which I am happy about-gaining weight is healthy and I will definitely accept that! Now, if only I could get my insurance cards so I can get a sonogram and find out the gender of this VERY ACTIVE little baby inside me. I swear MS left etchings in my uterus of what to do while bored, tired, and just plain wanting to annoy mommy. On the MS front she is a talking RUNNING handful. We are working on potty-training, she loves her pink potty chair and she goes "peepee" in it according to her. The funny thing is, she demands toilet paper after use and insists on flushing that in the big potty and waving bye bye to it... Very cute but that is to be expected she is a P/B child and we are very proud of her accomplishments as any parent would be. She also plays "sock monster" this happens by putting a sock on her hand and she will run after everyone in sight going ARGGGGH, very cute and I am sure she will do it in public someday and make me apologize to some poor stranger. M has also taught her to blow boogers, keep in mind his blowing snot and mine are two different things. He has taught her to hold the side of a nostrel and blow-hard... Thanks M I really appreciate it when she blows snot... all over me. She has figured out that the highchair is climable and when she is hungry tries to climb it, this is NOT okay with me and she gets in trouble everytime but she is stubborn like me and we go back and forth about 20 times before the food is actually ready for her consumption. She is doing way too many cute things now and definitely knows how to throw on the charm when she is in trouble. There are days when I have to cover my face to tell her no and divert her attention somewhere else because I am laughing to hard to really tell her no. The lovely joys of parenthood!

Dog Is Gone

This was an everyday occurence, this would be why Fiona now has a nice home in the country with a very nice family.

Everything Eventually Comes Together.... Right?

Its really hard to blog lately when life gets so busy! My froggy-friend has been on my butt to make yet another blog post, so I guess I need to buckle down and try to get back to our regularly scheduled program on MY life haha!

M likes his job but hates working with all the idiots... He says its pretty sad when the stupid people are calling other people stupid. His stories he comes home with are rather amusing and really shows the intelligence of the crew!

MS is doing really good. She sure is growing. She is 7lbs. 4 oz. 20 inches long now. She is now the size of an average newborn, which is just crazy! She is sleeping fairly well. Yesterday me and her tangled all day. I just wanted to crawl in a hole and not come out, unfortunately that was not an option, but she was a great little girl today-I went back to liking her (I know that sounds horrible).

I am trying to be the "stereo-typical" housewife (yes, i know that is amusing for some of you). I am not doing that good though to say the least. My house looks like a tornado went through it and dinner is never ready when I want it to be. But hey I am trying!

I miss everyone back in Big-Town Kansas but I know this was a good move for us and financially we are getting back to where we want to be so that is a good thing and I am starting to stress a little less than what I was. We can actually afford a child now YAY!

Our neighbor SH is hilarious and has really welcomed us into the neighborhood, she is hilarious. She is a huge klutz (her words not mine)... The other night she spilled her coke in the process of cleaning that up she kicked her daughters plant across the yard, managed to break her chair, then fall off the side of the porch and now she was not under the influence of anything which makes it even more hilarious.

Our other neighbor J has tried to poison us with expired crackers A WHOLE FREAKING BOX FULL! I am glad that I am fairly anal about looking for expiration dates on everything... That box is now at the bottom of a dumpster. Lesson #600 Never accept food from strangers!

Better Days Ahead

We are finally moved into our place in small town Kansas, its really nice and has BRAND NEW appliances which I am in love with. If I could marry my appliances I would haha! In the past two weeks a lot of things have happened. M has a great job which he is going on day 5 of that job and still likes it so thats a good sign I think. We still don't have all our boxes un-packed but it will get there, I would rather stare at my daughter than un-pack because I will only be able to get those moments for so long.

Had to take MS to the doctor today. She (I thought) had allergies the classic red puffy eyes, stuffy nose, & sneezing. Well today she was running a fever so I took her in. I am definately changing doctors after the tests are ran... The nurses putting it nicely are incompetent and have proved they don't read charts so now I am questioning why these people even make charts if they don't read the stupid things. Anyways she is 7 lbs 4 oz now and 20 inches long YAY still in the 5th percentile but thats a lot of weight to gain in two months, as long as the numbers are going up I am happy. The doctor thinks she has GERD (Gastrointestinal Reflux Disease) its common in preemies so he is having us go Tuesday to do an upper GI X-ray with barium to make sure thats what it is. If it is then he is going to prescribe Zantac & Regulin to help with that. If thats what it is the meds sure will make my days so much better. I might actually be able to get something done instead of her screaming in pain and me going to run and get her because I know she is uncomfortable. I feel like crying when she cries because I want so bad to be able to take her pain away but I know I can't :(

The Evil Pacifier

This is the pacifier... It is EVIIIILL! MS unfortunately loves the stupid thing. So its time to outweigh the pros and cons

PROS
-It is said that a pacifier can decrease SIDS by 20 %
- it will soothe her when she is crying and sometimes get me and extra 30 min-hour sleep (which is a big pro)
- Since she is a preemie-they say it helps them gain weight faster (only a handful of reports published about this topic, so not too sure if its correct or not)
- She really seems to enjoy sucking on the evil thing

CONS
-at night if she loses it she screams until it is back in place-this happens about 10 times a night and it REALLY STINKS
-25% more likely to have chronic ear infections
-can cause dental problems (in children over 2 years old-which SHE WILL BE WEANED FROM IT BY THEN)

All in all the pros outweigh the cons its just less stressful for her to have it but more stressful for me. I just wish she would get tired of the pacifier and decide its no fun to suck on anymore... This is the ramblings of an over tired mommy haha!

In other news.
M's brother and sister-in-law are here in town so we have been enjoying visiting with them. They are really fun to hang out with and they seem to really like MS (its really cute).

Pull My Hair Out & Call My Britney Spears

Is this what I will be living in soon????

Today has been a very long day! I am sick of looking for places! The mortgage company that could finance a house offered a pretty crappy deal. They will cover 70% and we have to come down with 30%. Lets just put this into perspective a $50,000 house would be 15,000 down and a 50,000 dollar house is a rare find in the first place. So now house ownership is out of the question for the moment. We have two more places to pursue so hopefully we can get into one of them. We pushed back the move to Friday morning which is the last day that we can move. I am crossing my fingers and hoping that one of these come through because I really don't want to live with my parents. Living with my parents would be very stressful on everyone involved. As my wise husband says "your parents really like me now, I don't want it to be different."

On the MS front. She has been a little cranky butt today! She doesn't want daddy today. She wants to be held by mommy and screams if she isn't. I really hope she isn't getting sick because she normally isn't like this at all. She has a diaper rash from the Luv's diapers that we just tried so its back to Pampers, so much for trying to buy cheaper diapers! I feel so sorry for her little butt, she only wore them for a day but her butt is so raw (poor baby). She is rolling over all the time and its really scary, I can't put her someone and her stay in one spot. So now she is being placed in a bouncer/swing/or floor when I go to do other things because I am scared that she is going to fall off the bed or couch. I heard that you aren't supposed to put them in a bassinet after they start rolling but everything else is packed up so she will have to stay in that for a week longer (hopefully we have our own place in a week).

I just want this whole move to be over with so that I can get back into my routine again and have a house that is not full of boxes. It is going to be weird having M go back to work and I will have her all by myself. I am really not looking forward to that because I have relayed on him a lot (maybe too much) and I am scared that I can't do this all by myself!

Brick Walls & Dead Ends... Does it get better?

Well we are scheduled to move on the 3rd lets keep in mind people that it less than a week away LESS THAN A WEEK!!!!

Last month we almost locked into a rent-to-own 3 bedroom/2 bath, island stove all out gorgeous place. The guy we shall call him Mr. Icandoanything said that we would qualify no problem even after we told him about or not the greatest credit due to lovely student loans and a ex-wife. Again he says no problem they (lenders) won't care.

We begin to pack or what I thought tiny apartment until I begun to sort through things, but hey we are moving to a better place so its worth it RIGHT?

Well, the next day he calls and said well we had a little bit of a hitch and the lenders want you to have a co-signer. Well, I told him to call my father and talk to him about the details. Well that didn't work out. So now we are packed with no place to go.

We get on the phone and team up with my parents to find a place. So now we find a trailer for rent. Sounded really nice, my parents both loved and said they were sure we would to. Well okay lets pursue this. We told the lady about our credit she said it was fine we told them that my hubby had a felony (don't worry he didn't kill, assault, or rape anyone! It was more like the stupid state pursued a case even though the charges were dropped and it was a non-person level 10 (lowest) felong) anyways she said it wouldn't be a problem to get in. Well we get a call back the next day (keep in mind a $35 application fee) and said it was their policy to not let anyone with a felony live in the trailer park. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? We even explained the felony and that it was four years old to you and you said it would be okay! Now, its time to pull my hair out!

My mom said maybe it would be easier to get into a house and buy it. She talks to a realtor down their. The realtor emails me 6 different houses (keep in my mind my mom has explained everything) she says that Prudential can work with us and get us into something. I call the lady to tell her which houses I narrowed it down to so my mom can go look at them tomorrow (now today). I again re-iterate or credit and she says "oh well i didn't realize it was that bad" LADY I JUST TOLD YOU BEFORE WHAT OUR CREDIT SCORE WAS, WHATS SO HARD TO REALIZE???? So, she calls Wells Fargo and now they are trying to work with us (rolls eyes), he knows our credit score and he response was "well I can do things most people can't" well I am glad your confident in yourself but I definately not that confident in mr. egotistical!

We also called a place for rent (2bedroom/2bath) the man told me that he would think about the cats and get back to us. I call back later and the house has been rented out.

Is this our sign to NOT move? I know we have to move though because we live in a 1 bedroom apartment and we definately need more room their is no doubt about it. With small town M would be making more money and cost of living is cheaper than it is big town. Finacially this makes sense for us and I am getting really worried now that the 3rd is getting so close!

Dark & Rainy & Funny Stuff

The weather sure is affecting me today. I am in just one of "those" moods. I am sick of my house being torn up (due to moving) and I can't wait to just move so I have some order back in my life again. Right now my routine is total chaos and I am not liking it one bit!

Last night MS went to grandpa & grandma's so that we can pack some more (again trying to restore some balance in my house). They thought it was pretty cute that while lying on her tummy she can support herself on her hands and look directly at you. (Really, its kinda creepy that she is that strong, I really wasn't expecting her to be this strong so soon!

I can't wait to move into our nice 3 bedroom/2 bath house WITH A tornado shelter (a must in a part of Kansas known for getting bombed with tornados). I am so excited to get their and decorate (yes, i know i am nuts)! Or maybe i am just really excited because I will be getting out of this place that is called an "apartment" which is far from it! I would prefer to call it a dwelling that is falling apart as the landlord stands idly by because she isn't that smart and tries to fix everything herself.

Saturday M's brother and sister-in-law are coming into town. I am really excited to see them. Haven't seen them since our wedding (which has been a while). K (his sister-in-law) said she really wants to babysit well more power to her hahah. She might decide she never wants kids after this (in MS's defense she really isn't too bad, pretty well-natured but thats besides the point hah).

So, I guess I should title this post something different since most of my news is positive but I think I will keep it since after all its dark & rainy outside and I might just get blown away in a tornado today!!!

1 Month Old... How Time Passes So Quickly

MS is a month old today. I can't believe that she has been home with us for three weeks now. She is growing a lot! We went to the doctor on Friday and she is weighing 5 lbs. 12 oz. 18 1/2 inches long, head circumference 13 1/2 inches. So in the last month she has grown 1 lb. 10 oz. 1 1/2 inches long and her head has grown 1 1/2 inches. Thats insane! She is finally fitting really well into newborn clothes (yay, be ready for cute clothes pictures now haha)

She has quite the personality thats for sure. She definately has my temper and gets mad quickly but gets over it quickly too! She loves staring at me and M's face, lights, fans, and the Little Mermaid book. She could care less about any noises she will look where its coming from and then go right back to what she was doing beforehand. She is also in love with her pacifier, which I HATE HATE HATE, reason being I hate it is because even if she is dead asleep and loses it and wakes up screaming. Oh well its supposed to help prevent SIDS so I can't complain too much.

M and I decided we are definately moving to small town, KS and he is taking the job offer there. We are going to (most likely) be moving on May 2nd so its been pretty hectic around here packing and sorting and of course throwing things away.

I'm pretty excited about the move since I will be closer to my parents which I really miss a lot. On the other hand though I feel bad because M's parents are here and he for the most part has lived here his whole life. He is going to have to adjust to all the streets and probably get lost a couple times and won't be close to his family and I feel bad for that. Even though thats what I did last year when I came up to live with him but it seems different.

We have so much to do, I didn't realize how much CRAP we had laying around that is now filling up the dumpster. Thankfully we have 4 dumpsters that are picked up weekly otherwise nobody else would be able to their trash where it needs to go (which would be rather amusing, since our landlord lives here and we are extremely tired of the way she goes about things. But if I discuss that further this post would turn into a rant and I don't intend on making it that)

My Cat is Bigger than Your Cat!

-I have become to realize my whole life revolves around the munchkin whether I like it or not

-My nipples are very sore

-I hate pumping and I hate the stupid nipple shield, why won't she take my naked boob!!!?

-My cat is still bigger than she is and he is only 7lbs.

-I am a zombie, I am still not used to no sleep, I am still not believing anyone who tells me it will get better because then I will get my hopes up and it will never happen

-I love the little munchkin but she loves puking on me more

-Can you devoice a baby? Yeah thats what I thought, damn the luck

-Went to see the peditrician today and she is 4 lbs. 14 oz. now

Day 6 of NICU

Today has been an extremely long day. I don't think my body can take much more of the lack of sleep. I know once she is home it will be a lot easier because when she wants to eat I won't have to drive 15 minutes to get her some of my yummy moo juice! I can't wait to have her home. They put her back in the open air crib and her body temperature has been able to stay high enough to stay in there for 12 hours and counting, so thats one step closer to getting home. She started having an irregular heartbeat today that our nurse saw. They ran an 12 lead EKG and called in a cardiologist consult. We saw the cardiologist and he said its fairly common even in newborns and not to be alarmed. I am very glad it was nothing but very thankful to have had it checked out just in case. The doctors are really good but none of them communicate with each other which somewhat upsets me. One doctor (her actual peditrician) said to supplement my breast milk feedings with 35 ml of breast milk & fortifier to increase it to 22 calories. She did really well with that but then the nurse practioner came in a couple hours later and tried to reduce that amount. Well angry momma bear came out and I told her like it was, I don't think she likes me anymore but this stuff happens all the time and they always contradict each other. Its really rather annoying! She has gained even more weight. Gained an ounce in 1 day YAY she is now up to 4 lbs. 3 oz. so officially she is above her birth weight yippee! Tomorrow is most likely her carseat test, I am crossing my fingers that she stays warm (never been exposed to open air without blanket for more than an hour) and that her O2 stays where it needs to be. Keep your fingers crossed for this please!

Relocation to the Woods... Life Would Be Grand

A couple days ago I was reading a post by Mr. Crank. Here is the five people I would add to that lovely relocation list.


1. Richard Simmons: How can you be so darn chipper while hopping around and sweating like no other? Your hair must go through a bottle of hairspray a day. So if you went to the forest maybe you could become more man like and actually have some hair on your legs for once!

2. Britney Spears: Quit doing stupid things to try to get yourself noticed. I realize you want attention but this is not the way to do it. People do not just shave their heads, drink at all hours while caring for two children, and please next time when going out wear some damn underwear it won't kill you. Please hand me my tranquilizer gun.

3. Ashton Kutcher: Your a menace to society. You remind me of a little kid trying to get attention anyway they can as a desperate attempt to be liked. Get over it and put some big boy underwear on!

4. Lindsay Lohan: I used to like you, when you weren't such a alcoholic/druggy. You deserve a reward for going to rehab so many times... If only they wouldn't let you leave

5. Tom Cruise: Its your right as an American to discuss religion, but please don't push it upon people that could careless how you live your life. Don't act like such a baby and start jumping on chairs.

A Rambling of a Tired Woman

M isn't feeling well so of course you know the whole world must stop and he must be waited on hand and foot. Why is it that most men are such big babies when they are sick? I know its not all guys so don't go blasting my comments with those darn men comments haha. I remember growing up and my dad was the same way as M rarely got sick but when they did they seemed to think the whole world should notice. Even though I think my dad was worse then M (or so my mom has led me to believe)!

M has also become obsessed with hand sanitizer. Yes, I know he is weird but that's okay I guess he has clean hands with his new found obsession. Bottles of the stuff have been placed strategically throughout the house. I have to admit its kind of cute with his stuffy nose asking "wheres da saaaaaanitzer? Aha the things that amuse my little brain.

My belly button is starting to pop out. Does that mean I am about to be done cooking? I would love to go into labor at 37 weeks on the dot (considered full-term) but I know that probably won't happen. Anyways I am tempted to paint the inside of my belly button red like the turkey thermometers they have shoved in them so that I can "pop like a turkey" Yes people I am easily amused.

I am also extremely jealous. Everyone else gets tagged with meme's but not me. So really you faithful and loyal readers I want a meme or I will be forced to make my own meme. Yes desperate times call for desperate measures

Rant Alert

First I would like to thank my readers (I HAVE THREE! WOOHOO) for their input and encouraging words.

Regarding my post yesterday, M and I are at odds because of it. He doesn't seem to understand why I feel this way and I have tried my best to convey the message but now I am at my wits end and about to pull my hair out. He seems to think I have to take this shot everyday for it to do harm to me and I don't feel that way. I have already had that shot five times now and still take the pills (Procardia). So, now there is a war in the Mismatch Household over whether to take anymore of the stupid shots. I have drawn the line though I pretty much have my mind made up that no I am not going to take anymore of that shot but I will however continue to take the procardia. I am going to talk to my midwife's boss about it Dr. Iamsofreakingskinny about it since nobody over there can seem to listen to their voicemails. I know they probably think I am just some crazy lunatic that reads too much. They always tells me don't read, don't believe anything you read. Well where I get my sources I happen to believe, its all scientific evidence and not just something someone decided to write... Therefore I am going to ask questions because if someone won't make sure I am taken care of and question the doctors then I have to do it!

In one way I regret getting close to my Happy Midwife because now I am a little pissed off about the whole situation. Why didn't she tell me any of these things about the medicine? Did she feel it was safe? I don't know the answers to these questions because SHE WON'T CALL ME BACK. Its getting to the point where I am getting so mad if I wasn't already 33 weeks along I would switch clinics and go somewhere else.

In other news my tail bone really really really hurts! I swear MS has taken it in her hands and broken it to pieces haha. I know I shouldn't complain because it could be much much worse.

Also today I am going to be switching my HUGE blog over here so look for new posts for a while!

Breastfeeding In Public

Recently I read an article about a lady on Delta Airlines that got kicked off the plane before take of because she refused to use a blanket to cover herself while breastfeeding. She says she was discreet about it (had window seat, husband on other side of her blocking view of others). I find absolutely absurd! For one there is no law saying you can't breastfeed in public! What are you supposed to tell your baby? Oh sorry honey I can't feed you because of stupid a$$holes that feel uncomfortable around a BOOB! Even though when you are not attached to my boob, everyone feels that they can stare at them since they are humongous from feeding you... So sorry darling you will have to starve till we get home. This lady is suing the airlines which I totally agree with! This is absolutely absurd and the stewardess who kicked her off the plane I hope is FIRED! This story got me so mad and now I will make it a point to breastfeed in every public place I can just to make those other people feel uncomfortable mwhahaha! On the bright side maybe I will get asked to leave somewhere and can sue them and make some money haha I doubt it. Sorry just had to put my two cents in on this story.

Rant

I just looked at my picture... Not just a glance that I did earlier... I have realized my butt is almost as big as my stomach! How could I have let this happen? I know it was inevitable but I don't care! I felt that was one thing that I could control, the weight gain and stretch marks, but I guess thats all going down the drain because my butt is HUGE, my stomach is HUGE, and I have a good ten stretch marks. Ahhhh to be nieve again about being able to control something! Oh well that just means I will have to exercise more and get those endorphins flowing after Miss Uterine Hitchhiker is born. I have also been reading a lot of parenting blogs lately, having come from a rather HUGE family I thought I knew everything there was to know. Boy was I wrong, now I sit here and think will I be able to handle all this? Its going to be crazy, I think I will hide in my little hole and pretend to not have read any of those blogs and pretend I know everything again, haha I wish!

My friend frogbfound threw me a Bridal Shower. It was really neat to see how much of my family traveled three hours just to be there. That really made me feel important that day. Even though we did have a few shall we say "incidents" everything went pretty good. I got a lot of really cool stuff that I wanted and some things that I hadn't requested (see picture) but hey even those unrequested items were pretty cool! Thanks everyone

For the "incident" this would include a lady I was friends with for a while. L was supposed to be in my wedding and was invited to the bridal shower. We had a falling out a couple weeks beforehand. Unfortunately should decided she could not handle this like an adult and decided to show up to to my Bridal Shower. I handled it pretty good, she pretended like she was returning a blanket I let her borrow for her son. I opened the door and she yelled bitch and threw the blanket. I was appalled and extremely embarrased all I could muster saying was Thank You. Why or why did you just say thank you? Really I could have came up with a better come back then that but Thank you? Oh well it was probably a good thing because had she said anything else my lack of judgement might have kicked in and I would say things that shouldn't be said in front of family, friends, and acquaintances from the church. After my company had left L had her sister-in-law call me and attempt to degrade me and this is where my lack of better judgement came in and I began to yell and scream absurdities to no end and hung up. But L's SIL was presistent and kept calling to which my good judgement came in and I just called the police. Charges have been filed for phone harrasment and these parties have been spoken with. I could never have a good time without just a little added drama now could I? Thus is life.