Sunday, February 04, 2007

I have been tossing and turning all night, wondering this wondering that. It seemed like at every hour my eyes would pop open and hit me with yet another question. I swear M thinks I am going crazy, because I would sit there and ponder these questions and of course have to wake him up to discuss them because I felt they were just that important. Even though now looking back, it was more amusing then importance.

2am I woke up to wondering what if my parents could get here when the baby is born because there is a tornado? Great question right? Especially for 2 o'clock in the morning when the rest of the world is sleeping. I ponder well what if they had to run up and under a over pass to avoid it, would it be their death? Would they die on the day their grandchild is born? I sat and thought and seriously thought (I know your thinking I am crazy! I am beginning to think so) So, finally I could take it anymore! I woke M up to ask him about this question that has cluttered my sleep. He first started laughing and said where do you come up with these things? Which kinda hurt my feelings :( But then he said well they just wouldn't be able to make it see her born but they could see her afterwards. So, I was satisfied with the answer and everything was okay again.

3am I was awoke to yet another daunting question. This time it was will MS love me immediately and will I love her immediately? I mean don't get me wrong people I have feelings I could never have for some one other then my child in my stomach right now, but I can't quite say if its love or not. So, I lay there, half crying, half trying to think intellectually about all this. Finally I couldn't take it anymore. I woke M up!

Me: Honey??? Honey??? Honey???
M: What Now?
Me: Will I love MS as soon as I see her?
M: Do you like your pets when you first get them?
Me: Yes
M: Okay you will love MS a when you first see her

Not sure if that was really the best answer for M to say but it helped me go to sleep for the rest of the night and here I am now.

I have begun to think I am absolutely certifiably wacko nuts! I can never find anything anymore. If I put my cup down, 90% chance of me not finding it again that day. In M's words "the baby is sucking your brain out" thinks sweetie. Love you too :)

4 comments:

Julie said...

Shawnda,
I don't find myself waking up worrying about stuff, even if I did we all know Josh is impossible to wake up anyway. But I wake up alot with horrible leg cramps. Does that happen to you? I know they're normal, but they drive me nuts and the doctor told me not to lay on my back, but thats the only way I have found to relieve the cramps for a little bit, plus I am pretty comfortable on my back. I roll over on my back in my sleep and don't even notice, so how am I supposed to stay off my back when I roll over in my sleep and not notice?

Shawnee said...

My OB told me not to worry about laying on my back if thats how i am comfortable.

Julie said...

well, I guess all doctors are diffrent. So many of them say diffrent things, how do you know who's right?

Shawnee said...

Julie,
You don't know who is right, you just cross your fingers and do your own damn research haha